May 2010
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You begin to save the world by saving one person...
Charles Bukowski
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not real
abbytoir:
charmingortedious:
morninggloria:
I went through a phase when I felt like I had a for real, not even kidding, actual crush on the character of Jim Halpert from The Office. I was legitimately for real not even kidding jealous of the character of Pam. Neither of these people are real.
I was glad when I didn’t have a crush on Jim anymore, because real people are not supposed to...
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Ben Wasser Knows What the Fuck Is Up
benwasser:
“Violating the law, or simply invading someone’s privacy for political gain, has long been repugnant to Americans’ sense of fair play. As Watergate taught us, we rightfully reject illegally breaking into candidates’ private communications for political intrigue in an attempt to derail an election.” -Sarah Palin
One of the worst repercussions of the growing stupidity of the general...
not real
morninggloria:
I went through a phase when I felt like I had a for real, not even kidding, actual crush on the character of Jim Halpert from The Office. I was legitimately for real not even kidding jealous of the character of Pam. Neither of these people are real.
I was glad when I didn’t have a crush on Jim anymore, because real people are not supposed to have actual feelings about fake...
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Real Shit
junglequeen:
You’re not good for me, not even a little bit. Okay, I lied. The part of you that makes me laugh and the part of you that makes me melt everytime you talk and the part of you that makes me feel completely comfortable to be me, those are good. They’re good for me. What’s not good for me is the part of you that makes me doubt myself and others’ abilities to love me. I don’t like the...
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A tree is known by its fruit; a man by his deeds....
St. Basil
This corny as fuck (and appallingly accurate) quote goes to VelveteenRabbit.
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Sternsauce,
sternerandrogier:
As always, your advice is motherfucking perfect.
Just remember, kids: I can’t give myself sage life advice, but I can give it to you.
Love,
Momma Sterner
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The future wife
sternerandrogier:
Here’s what happened. As you know, Sterner, I despair of ever finding a mate and hate & resent that you have a live-in boyfriend. In fact I hate and resent anyone who can find a relationship.
Anyway, I was driving home Thursday night and despairing about this. I actually resorted to prayer. I said, please, God, let me meet my future wife. And I had this kind of...
April 2010
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i think i've been unfair to nickelback
kbels:
morninggloria:
What about Linkin Park? They’re arguably shittier. They even have a guy who raps!
One thing! I don’t know WHY It doesn’t even matter how hard I TRY The lyrics sound like they were written by a high school junior who is pissed that his mom won’t let him drive her Ford Taurus to the movie theater because he got a D in English. The vocals sound like they’re performed by...
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I pick my outfits in the morning based on how I...
My life is GLAMOROUS
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jmarie3:piscesinpurple: Tell Me Something Good //...
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The middle class loves the republican party in the...
abbytoir
Brilliant.
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toosweet4rockandroll:Toto - Africa
This song is...
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“He can never stack up to the one man I measure everyone against.”
– Julia Roberts, My Best Friend’s Wedding (via thoughtsdetained)
I totes feel this way about Rogier and J. Gerken.
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The Food Nightmare Beneath Our Feet: We're Running... →
buffleheadcabin:
nosex:
For every unit of food we consume, using the conventional agricultural methods employed in the U.S., six times that amount of topsoil is lost. Since, according to the U.S. Food and Drug Administration, the average person eats a ton of food each year, that works out to 12,000 pounds (5,443 kilograms) of topsoil. John Jeavons estimates that using current farming...
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DHA: Docosahexaenoic Acid →
Sterner is shoppin’ for vitamins today.
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Erykah Badu @ Greek Theatre
downtownlobby:
Erykah Badu’s latest release “Amerykah Part Two (Return of the Ankh)” has already taken up a nice piece of real estate on my iPod, and her live shows are even better. Get ready to catch Erykah Badu and opener Janelle Monae, when they both take the stage on Sunday, June 20th at The Greek Theatre. Tickets go on sale this Saturday, May 1st but a presale is set for today May 29th at...
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recklessthoughtss: I Would Die 4 U - Prince
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10 THINGS I LEARNED AT SCHOOL TODAY:
surrealistkitsch:
1. POLICEMEN WEAR COOL BOOTS
2. FAKE BLOOD CAN LOOK VERY REALISTIC
3. CORONER’S VANS RESEMBLE RAPIST VANS
4. PEOPLE ONLY CARE ABOUT DEATH WHEN “POPULAR KIDS” OR “POPULAR TEACHERS” DIE
5. DRIVING DRUNK IS BAD N’ STUFF OR SUMTHING?
6. THE BLACK GUY ALWAYS DIES FIRST
7. MY SPANISH TEACHER MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE GIVEN A COP A BJ TO GET OUT OF A TICKET
8. MY SCHOOL IS RETARDED
...
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A Poem For My Archnemesis
You remind me of the crowded back alleys of LA
Loud and classless
Where they sell Cucci instead of Gucci which is fitting
As the only thing you’re Queen of is comparisons to the original.
xo
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So, Oklahoma is pretty awesome. (Not) →
brunettevixen:
“The Oklahoma Legislature voted Tuesday to override the governor’s vetoes of two abortion measures, one of which requires women to undergo an ultrasound and listen to a detailed description of the fetus before getting an abortion.
Though other states have passed similar measures requiring women to have ultrasounds, Oklahoma’s law goes further, mandating that a doctor or...
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In case any of you cocksmokers care
I did my homework last night AND had date night. WINNER.
Also, what is with all the serious “Tumblr” attitude today? I keep reading people reblogging other assholes and yapping off about some dumbass shit no one cares about. See, this is why Tumblr annoys me. It’s a “community” if you want it to be. I don’t, and I don’t like witnessing it. Any of...
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PETA's Frequently Asked Questions
Rather eloquent.
“What do you mean by ‘animal rights’?” People who support animal rights believe that animals are not ours to use for food, clothing, entertainment, experimentation, or any other purpose and that animals deserve consideration of their best interests regardless of whether they are cute, useful to humans, or endangered and regardless of whether any human cares about them at all...
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More instances in which school does not fit into...
I am way too fucking old to be in school. Shit is on the real.
So for your BA program at my school, you have to engage in group projects. I have whined about this before, because I FUCKING HATE GROUPS. Even a Nicole Sterner Fanclub would annoy me, that is how deep my hatred for groups goes. Blah blah blah, so two bitches this weekend failed to do their portion of the assignment for the week,...
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Hey you fucking hookers
This will sound silly and shallow (aka right up my alley) but my delightful friend Nina just started up her own airbrush tanning biznass and she is fucking GOOD. Shit normally costs $65 but she told me my frenz can do it for $40 as long as you can roll to her house (in Glendale) to do it. Just spreadin’ the word.
You know where I am. theurbanaesthete@gmail.com SEX TIMES!
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STERNER JUST HAD HER MOTHERFUCKIN' WASHER AND...
WHAT’S UP NOW, BITCHES?!
Oh yeah, I’m getting old and I don’t give a FUCK! Hoot!
I’d have never thought renting a washer and dryer would give me such pleasure, but it does.
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A little ditty on my upcoming posts about milk,...
Well hi there.
Before I continue on with my ranting posting about the intricacies of the American food and beauty industries, I’d like to give you all a little disclaimer, because I’m already getting some saucy replies and messages.
First and foremost, no one likes to be told what to do. Am I telling you what to do or think? Goodness, no. I’m just giving you some...
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A man is really ethical only when he obeys the...
Albert Schweitzer
